Monday, September 07, 2009 11:34:00 AM
My blog is dead recently because I have nothing to blog about. I hate to think about home too much. It hurts. I know that I would go on and on and on about how I really miss home. hmm, I know how each and everyone of us would really really love to further their studies overseas if they could, well Im here, I should be grateful right?
I guess I am, but being the pampered daughter I am, it's kinda hard for me to adapt, eventho it has been a month stay here. I skyped and msn-ed and hang on the phone with my friends and family almost everyday. It made me feel at home. Well atleast.
They said that being here is like being out of the cage. We have all the freedom we want, we can do just whatever we want, without parents, without anyone telling us not to do this not to do that, or do this do that. No one cares if you ever come home late(or not). I got all the freedom I wanted while in Singapore, I got to go where ever I wanted, With whoever I wanted, did whatever I wanted. I tasted all that. I dont need to be here to want all that, Im here to study, Im here to gather all that I can. I know it's easy for people (even my parents) to say that I have my friends here, I have Allah, for if I set my niyyah well, everythings gonna be alright.
But do they know how hard it is ? For me ? I am still searching that side of me, that is strong enough for all this. For if you must know, I still cant believe myself that I am here. In Cairo, Egypt. An Azhar Student. I know it has been my dream, but reality check, hello ? The Ida Mariam who always hangs out late until midnight, who always goes to the movie almost everyweek, who always wastes her time on unnecessary things, is here ? As an Azhar Student ?
Allah knows better. InsyAllah kullu bilkhair.
At the pyramid.
At the void deck.
I smiled.
Look me in the eyes.
Tell me the difference between the two.
Can you tell ??
Pray for me people.
I miss you all.
xoxo.
