Sunday, April 22, 2007 7:49:00 PM
Thank you ya Allah! I met Atikah Syarah today!! I miss her so muach!! & this feeling of happiness when we 4 Bagedils get together. So happy laa =D I really miss them so much & we really need to go out together soon oke??
Munazarah at MWTI was great! Ma'had Johor girls are so freaking good! rahmah! You deserve to win you know! But then maybe it's her rezki & there's hikmah behind all this. I felt so disappointed you know when your name wasn't being annouced as the best speaker. No matter what, believe me, YOU ARE SO B L O O D Y GOOD laa!! I'm so proud of you :) Shafawatri tak ley mng awk lah sebenarnye! :) Saya respect samer awk laa!
Instead of going home straight, Huda & Syarah & I (I wish Atikah was there with us..) went to pasir Ris. We went bubbling (ahha!) & we talked about some stuff laa. Some stuff that made me wonder. Some stuff that touched my heart laa.
After hering to what Atikah had to say & what Huda had to say. I realised that I don't feel like I belong in MI, enethough I have been in it since 1997. I feel so lost & confused. Sometimes I feel like crying for all I know that I just want to seek knowledge. I think if not for my beloved friends there, I wouldnt survive & that I'll be long gone, seeking knowledge somewhere else. yes. But nomatter what, being with my bagedils is enough to make my day so wonderful :)
Btw, my wonderful friends out there, Rasyidah, Rafidah, Liyana, Isha, Kak Nada, Nadya, Syieera, Nasy ++, I'm sorry if I happened to abondon you guys just now :) Sometimes being so happy just makes me go lalalalala. Later I give you guys sweets oke? :)
I know it's stupid to cry over this small stupid matter. But what my heart really wants is just to say that I care. So I ask myself, should I make the first move? Or should I wait? Would you even care to say what I want to hear? What my heart desires?
I think it's best that I keep it low, leave it in Allah's hand and accept whatever is fated. For all I know, I'll be missing you <3
It's getting hard to, be around you
There's so much I can't say
and do you want me to hide the feelings
and look the other way
Cause I don't know
How to make the feeling stop.. :'(
& I don't think that my heart can take much more..
"Ya Allah, berilah Ida keimanan kekuatan ketaqwaan dan keradhaan dlm menjalani kehidupan ini dan menerima segala apa yang telah ditetapkan dgn hati yang ikhlas..."
Salamz!
